Thru the Eyes of a Marketer

No Stick Cooking Sprays: Stop Greasy Marketing!

2012-01-02T10:57:00.002-06:00

Being politically correct, this is irritating. Being honest, this pisses me off.

I was cooking scrambled eggs recently and pulled out the can of no stick cooking spray. With a minute on my hands as the eggs cooked, I did what most people do - I read the label (I didn't have a cereal box handy!). What I read shocked and embarrassed me.

In the "Nutritional Facts" section of the can, it said that a serving had zero calories or fat.  But knowing these sprays were basically cooking oil, I wondered how this could be. As I read on, I learned that whomever designed the label (the marketing department, I presume), decided that one "serving" equaled a quarter second spritz. I'm not sure about you, but my 40-something year old reflexes don't let me do much in a quarter second any more!

As I continued to read, later in the label it stated that a one second spray covers a ten inch skillet...more like it! And a one second spray contributes one gram of fat and nine calories. Terrific...even a one second spray is low in fat and calories!

So why did they try and hide (mislead?) their nutritional values by stating that a quarter second spray has zero fat or calories, knowing full well that nobody uses only a quarter of a second spray? Maybe it's because at a quarter second spray, they can (and do) claim a can has almost 800 servings! (And of course, using a more realistic one second spray means each can really has ~200 servings...still quite a bit, I might add, from one can!)

And considering the world through a sales person's lense, my assumption is that the marketers are training the sales team on how to position the product using the quarter second claim (it's still better for you than butter even with a full second's spray!) to distributors, wholesalers and grocers using this baloney. Ugh.

So as a sales and marketing guy who's proud of being on the "commercial" side of business life and is trying to uphold a reputation, I say to my colleagues:  Be ethical and transparent. If your product is better, then share the great news in a captivating manner that differentiates you from your competition. And charge for that value.

I'm still not sure why the no stick cooking spray folks are hiding their real value...even at a full one second and 200 servings it seems like a great product.  Maybe there's a product extension opportunity...stop the greasy marketing practices from sticking!

Copyright @ Keith Chaitoff 2012

Marketeer or Projecteer?

2011-05-07T15:56:00.018-05:00

Millions (hundreds of thousands?) of people work in a marketing department. They call themselves "marketers". But are they? Are you?

To check, answer the following:

From a templated marketing plan, can you create your own?
Can you hire an ad agency to produce a brochure?
Can you execute a marketing research study and dial the findings into a business case?
Can you work trade show booths and travel with sales people to create demand and advance sales cycles?
Can you communicate customer requirements to R&D, and forecasts to Planning?

If the answers are "yes", then you qualify as a projecteer. Does this make you a marketeer? Not necessarily.

I think top notch marketers have something in their DNA that instinctually drives them toward accurate and creative (relevantly differentiated) ideas and decisions. They have a sensitivity toward customers and overall competitive market dynamics that enables them to see the world differently - more acutely - than others...anticipating market responses and creating meaningful recommendations. And executing against them. They are the ones that don't need marketing research to drive decisions - customers often don't know what they want until it's created by great marketers and engineers. They are the ones that give ad agencies ideas - or collaborate effectively in the creative process. And they understand the impact of a competitive launch...and courageous ways to win.

So can anyone be a great marketer? A truly great, instinctual marketer? I don't think so. But can most people become effective project managers, learn the marketing process, and contribute to effective marketing outcomes? Even becoming very strong marketers? Yes.

This hearkens back to similar questions such as, "are leaders made or born"? I'm not sure that one's ever going to be answered definitively...just like the question, "are you a Projecteer or a Marketeer"? Both are valuable, but don't mistake the two.

(Thanks DP for teaching me so much.)

Copyright @ Keith Chaitoff 2011

I Don't Care If My Tile Cleans Easily!

2011-02-05T07:06:00.013-06:00

My wife and I were buying tile a month or so ago. We walked into the store and were welcomed nicely by the salesperson. He appropriately asked, "How can I help you?" (open-ended question...nice training). When we replied that we were looking for back splash tile, the look in his eye told me it was over. And the words began to flow. He told us about a great new tile that did not have to be cleaned. He told us about a color that was popular (not knowing the color of our counter tops, cabinets or paint). He told us about how great the price was. At that point, I literally walked away to browse elsewhere while my wife - ever more patient - spent a few more minutes with him.

We did not care about cleanliness. We did not care about color. We did not care about price. We were tiling a very small section of our very small 1925 kitchen and wanted metal tile with a french fleur-de-lis design. He was 0-fer-3 in terms of knowing our needs. He never took the time to learn.

At first I was a bit bothered, then amused, then just bored. I have no doubt he listened and learned when the tile factory representative came to his store to teach the sales staff about their products. But as the saying goes, people don't buy a drill, they buy the ability to make a hole. And to improve on this old sales and marketing adage, I'd add, "for a reason". Maybe they want to save some money vs. paying a pro. Maybe to get the job done quickly so they don't miss much of the football game. Maybe to please their spouse. Maybe all three. Maybe none of the three.

I know I'm not teaching you anything new: Focus on the customer. Help them discover what they truly need and want - and why. Connect with them. Focus on their purchase criteria and keep them focused on it. Ask questions. Listen to and care about the answers. Don't spew features.

Yep, the selling basics are the selling basics, and likely won't ever change! Just like the metal back splash tile that we bought...someplace else!

Copyright @ Keith Chaitoff 2011

Don't Treat Performance Problems with Roundup

2010-09-11T07:36:00.011-05:00

I'd like to lay claim to this idea, but that would be disingenuous. It came from a colleague while waiting in line at the Beijing airport (which is still interestingly identified as PEK, but I digress). We were talking about structural changes required in the sales organization to increase our win rate in an increasingly complex selling environment - become the trusted advisor, win in the c-suite, solution selling...all that good stuff. The conversation drifted to resources, and that's when he shared this nugget, "Employees are like plants in the garden. There are few bad ones, just the right place for each."

Many years ago I was on the receiving end of a seminar about servant leadership. I remember the speaker claiming that he had never fired anyone, but rather, had made many moves to ensure struggling employees were given the right conditions to thrive in. I was skeptical. And while I still don't necessarily believe there is a place for everyone in every organization all the time, I have come to realize the incredible leverage a leader has by planting the right employees in the right conditions at the right time.

So what's the equivalent of sun, water and soil acidity in terms of human capital? Is it placement in a commercial versus operations versus R&D role? Front line versus back office? Individual contributor versus manager? Strategic versus tactical assignments?

And within any garden there are microclimates. While the garden may only occupy 100 square feet, the south end may get just a bit more sun than the north end, as it lay just beyond the shade of a nearby oak tree. The equivalent in the workplace? Maybe it's a late shift versus an early start. Maybe it's matching the employee to the right team within the department, or slotting them in the right training program. Or perhaps finding them the right mentor to smooth out some rough edges.

So, can you say you like hostas more than day lillies? That you prefer roses over ferns? Pines versus oaks? By now you get the point - there's likely a place for each to thrive, for each to contribute to the larger garden. And there's a beautiful garden for each spot.

But I'm still not sold on the fact that there are no bad plants. Admit it - we've all made a bad hiring or placement decision or two. Some plants are just plain deceiving or difficult. Poison ivy is beautiful in a shady woodland garden. And just ask the bug about the venus flytrap. Nor is there a replacement for a strong garden designer to choose and site plants properly in the first place. Or a gardener with a sharp hoe, full watering can or bag of fertilizer when a plant is spreading out of control, wilting in the heat, or in need of some encouragement. And as painful as it is to admit failure, there is the occasional need for Roundup. Just be sure it's the last resort, and not a crutch substituting for good gardening.

Copyright @ Keith Chaitoff 2010

Good Advertising Sells Bad Products...Once

2010-04-01T19:00:00.004-05:00

If you're my age, you'll remember the Popeil Pocket Fisherman. If you are my son's age, you likely have a Tamagotchi with a dead, leaky battery in your junk drawer. And if you are my daughter's age, you'll surely own a Snuggie. By now it's likely pilling. Badly.

I must admit that I never owned a Popeil Pocket Fisherman. But boy oh boy, I sure did want one.

Ron Popeil developed his father Samuel's company into Ronco. In 2005, Ron sold the company for $55MM. Sounds good, huh? Unfortunately, just two years later, Ron was the lead creditor in Ronco's bankruptcy trying to recoup what had been promised to him. Yeah, he got something, but not nearly what he expected.

Yes, good advertising can sell a bad product...once.

And those Ginsu knives sitting in my mom's drawer? They're keeping The Clapper company. And I just asked my wife if she'd buy another Snuggie. I'll bet by now you can guess the answer.

Turning Steakholders Into Stakeholders

2010-03-25T22:25:00.006-05:00

They're hungry for something new. Really hungry. So what do you do? Toss 'em a piece of meat. Red meat. That is why they're called steakholders, right?

Those pesky steakholders always want more. Something new. Something bigger. Something better. And in the end, they do make the world go 'round. So we toss 'em some meat.

But exactly who are "they"...
...shareholders?
...customers?
...employees?

And how should they be prioritized when it comes to dishing out resources or consideration in decision-making?

Some business leaders put shareholders ("the street") first. Cut costs so the quarterly numbers come in. Short term action, short term thinking. Short term gain, maybe.

Others put customers first. It sounds noble, but investing in them while your employees feel under-valued is not a recipe for long term success. At some point you won't recruit the best and brightest to take care of your hard-earned customers and things will unravel.

But what if employees came first? Is it possible that if we take care of our employees, they'll in turn take care of our customers, who in turn will take care of shareholders? If we hire and retain the best R&D scientists who then give customers the best products - who buy them at higher prices due to relevant competitive advantage - then the shareholders will be just fine.

By giving employees priority, you'll have true stakeholders - employees, customers, shareholders and whole communities that are involved because they have a vested interest. Put your employees first and replace those hungry steakholders, who want returns at any cost, with stakeholders that are working for your success.

Copyright @ Keith Chaitoff 2010

What's Your Legacy?

2009-12-12T14:55:00.001-06:00

As the intro to The Jeffersons once rang out on Saturday night television, "You're moving on up...". But are you moving too fast? Or do you want to move up too fast?

Nearly everyone I know who has climbed the corporate ladder has had a defining momement - or moments - in their career. They delivered a high visibility project or financial performance. They created and lead something great. They did not confuse activity with results. Having your name synonymous with a defining strategy or tactic generates stories that become part of corporate lore. Legacies are born. It's real, performance-based contribution - usually out of the norm. It takes courage, creativity, leadership and persistence.

If you have not become the fabric of a penetrating story - you may be moving up too fast.

Having been promoted because you have a good pedigree or have found favor with an influencial mentor is part of the game. But at some point, someone's going to ask, "what have you delivered?" And I don't mean buried in the accomplishments of a larger team. And you need to distinguish between a team you lead that did something great vs. your leading a team to something great.

And there's another angle. Until you have earned a spot on a pedestal, you may be labeled as overly ambitious. Or maybe worse - high maintenance. You're one of these people if you answer yes to the following:

Are 1:1s with your manager consumed by career develop discussions vs. goal achievement?
Does succession planning ("organizational inventory", "talent management review") put knots in your stomach?
Do you dwell on comparing your performance to that of peers?
Do you debate ratings during performance appraisals?

So next time you feel like your career's stalled, ask yourself a tough question: "Have I created a legacy by delivering results in a unique manner via a strategy I developed and execution I drove?"

Legacies don't have to be huge, but they do need to have your imprint on them. George Jefferson left a legacy - I'm remembering him 20+ years after he left the airwaves. Yep, he'd be on top of my candidate slate if I had an opening.

Copyright @ Keith Chaitoff 2009

Messaging 101 in Five Words - And Mnenomics to Remember Them

2009-11-04T21:27:00.020-06:00

Concise. Differentiated. Memorable. Relevant. Singular.

That's it. The hardest part may be remembering them. So to help with that, I've developed a few witty mnemonic devices that roll off the tip of your tongue:

Chondroitin Does Mean Reduced Soreness.
Chloroform Drops Meandering Rowdy Savants.
Creepy Dingoes Mesmerize Ranchers in Speedos (OK, that's six words...does "in" count?)

So there you have it - a full semester's worth of coursework in five words, plus a tool tossed in at no charge to help you remember them.

The way I figure it, I've just saved you $225 in marketing textbooks and one semester's worth of tuition coursework at $2,000. Plus, I've freed up your valuable time so you can invest your savings in the fantasy football league pool rather than spending Saturdays with the MBA group working on your team project.

And all I'm asking for is 50% of your winnings to help fund my kids' college.

Copyright @ Keith Chaitoff 2009

Disintegrating VHS Memories

2009-11-01T14:00:00.001-06:00

Calling a friend and asking, "Do you want to play?"

Giving them a ride to that friend's house. Throwing up on the way there.

Crying, and needing a band-aid.

Spending three days at the Memorial Day soccer tournament.

Talking to themselves - oblivious to others.

Wanting to be picked up. Wanting to be put down.

Kissing you in public. Hugging you in public. Even talking to you in public.

Lice checks. Lice found.

Sleeping in your bed, or on your shoulder. Sweet-smelling morning breath.

Jumping in leaves; playing on the kitchen floor with coloring books and legos; sidewalk chalk, razor scooters.

Doing art projects - popsickle sticks, pipecleaners and paste.

Shopping for new school supplies and Halloween costumes.

Before you know it, these things don't happen any more. And you never know the last time they will. It happens in a routine moment, but then is gone forever. Granted, newer, equally exciting - maybe even more exciting - things take their place. But the old stuff you loved - or took for granted - doesn't happen any more. Maybe they will when you're a grandparent. Hopefully.

My 18 year old son finished a marathon today. My 14 year old daughter made the varsity gymnastics team as a freshman. They both get great grades and have wonderful friends. They treat the dog like gold - always a good sign.

We are all definitely on to bigger and better things.

But they'll never call a friend and ask "if they want to play", won't ask you for a ride, or throw up in the car on the way (at least not for the same reason as when they were young). As for sweet-smelling breathe - those days are long gone...along with the gunk that was always stuck in their braces. And you can schedule a garage sale for the Razor scooter, side-walk chalk and old school supplies and Halloween costumes.

If you'll excuse me now, I've got to copy those old home movies on VHS tapes to DVDs before they disintegrate. Without them, I won't be able to show my grand kids.

Potato, Potatoe, Schedule, Shedule

2009-10-23T22:17:00.000-05:00

I often invite Europeans to lunch so I can hear them tell me they need to check their "shedule." Likewise, I love the sound of my Canadian friends telling me about a "pr-o-cess" they've discovered. Yep, that would be process with a long o.

I recently saw an American speaking to an audience of primarily non-Americans. This speaker pronounced his words in a sophisticated, continental manner - shedule vs. schedule, for example. I thought it especially interesting because I knew that this speaker was a born and bred American...California-reared, West Point grad, working the corporate grind. But something motivated him to pronounce words the way he had probably never done so before.

At first I thought this was wrong. I wanted to shout, "You're American - be proud!" But I continued to ponder. "If we're all taught to know our audience," I thought, "then maybe pronouncing the word as shedule was pretty smart."

So, is it right to speak differently just because of your audience? Frankly, my jury's still out. On one hand, you are who you are - be proud. On the other hand, there's nothing wrong with being considerate of those around you.

I'd be curious to hear your view on this. And if you can, please leave your feedback before Sunday. That's when I fly to New Orleans. Or is it Nyaleans? Well, let's see how I say it when I'm down by the bayou.

Copyright @ Keith Chaitoff 2009

Production Forecasts and the Cubs' Series Victory

2009-05-02T21:06:00.001-05:00

Few things can be accurately forecasted. Put ten Ph.D. economists in a room and see how well they play in the same sandbox when pressed to predict the state of affairs in three years. And watch the sand fly if you push for five year consensus. OK, maybe the one-year will be +/- 20%. Maybe not.

So why would we do any better in the business world? There’s a reason we discuss “rationalizing factory capacity” ad nauseum. And there is a reason we have jobs - things change. In the end, it’s because nobody can predict the future. In many ways, those that do it best, win.

Sure, there’s an entire business discipline called “Sales and Operations Planning” (S&OP) to try and accurately forecast factory demand and production. Yep, sophisticated modeling tools, too, to account for seasonality and more. But I’d still challenge anyone to look at their long range plan from five years ago and plot it against what the following five years actually looked like. Fast-moving competitors, your blockbuster product launch, new management direction, the unexpected new national account (or lost one), economic swings, manufacturing issues due to supplier shortcomings or obsolescence, quality awards that lead to good press, the act of nature that few have funding to fully plan for, an acquisition or divestiture…the reasons go on and on that have ruined many a well-intentioned forecast - and keep us employed.

It does not mean you can't come close if you're really good (focused, smart, resourced), but it is almost inevitable that forecasting accuracy will decline as time goes on and variables increase. Sometimes you'll do better, sometimes worse.

I’m not just taking advantage of this tough economy to justify my position. I can point back to an article I saw years ago from Tom Peters that basically said long range planning beyond five years (or was it three?) is a waste of time. He writes books and is on the speaking tour, so he can credibly say things like this. Beyond wise words from business leaders, just take a look at any of your own forecasts…who was your pre-season World Series pick last year?

My message: Be practical. If you’re a sales and marketing type, do your best to help the factory produce what you can sell. Sandbagging doesn’t help anyone. If you’re the factory guy or gal, understand that the commercial folks are trying. The fact is, if we could forecast anything well, we would not need a stock market – the entire concept based on two people (buyer and seller) betting on well-researched opposite expectations. Oh, and if you’re good at it, let me know when the Cubs are going to win the World Series…I’ll place a big bet in Vegas. Someone will be on the other side to accept it.

Copyright @ Keith Chaitoff 2009

Hire Wisely: The "Salad Bar" Personality Test

2009-02-08T19:19:00.001-06:00

I've not done a large-scale study, so I can't cite statistical support for my theory. But I have done lots of field research...in my company's cafeteria. If there are any anthropology Ph.D. candidates out there searching for a thesis topic and you want to collaborate, let me know.

My theory is simple: the best indicator of personality type is someone's approach to the salad bar. Thus, you can throw away your file with tricky interview questions such as, "If you were a tree, what kind would you be?" And you don't have to hire psychological testing services at thousands of dollars per new hire. Instead, schedule all of your interviews over lunch and head for the salad bar.

Let me explain. Consider the human genotype known as "hominid typus B process orientia". This classic personality type is characterized by a slow, methodical approach to the salad bar. It's the person that dwells on the choice between the disposable styrofoam bowl and the washable heavy plastic one. Next, they approach each veggie selection carefully - choosing just the right sliced cucumber, for example. And when they choose just the right tomato, they rearrange the cukes so everything fits "just so". Of course, there is little awareness for the queuing behind them of our next personality type.

Our next subject is known as "hominid typus A spastica cantsit stillicus". This personality type has evolved over thousands of years and does not dwell over any particular choice. They move fast. They don't rearrange their salad plate mid-stream. If their plate is full and they want more cheese, they may go so far as to get a second plate. Their end product is not neat and orderly.

Just as the ape lineage has evolved in many ways, so has our salad-bar eater. There are many subtypes:

Dressing carefulicus: Observe how this subtype applies salad dressing...never slopping it on directly. Instead, they use those little 1 oz. paper cups for careful application later.
I dowhatIwanticus creativicus: What is it about these people that mix beets, sunflower seeds, garbanzo beans and feta cheese?
I'minmyownworldicus: They wait to take their money out until after their salad is weighed.

So tomorrow, when you're having lunch with colleagues, expand my research with your own field observations. Write and let me know what you find. If enough of us contribute to the research supporting this emerging scientific discipline, we might even replace Rorschach. And in the end, we'll hire right!

Copyright @ Keith Chaitoff 2009

Let Your Phone Write Your Performance Assessment

2009-01-29T20:16:00.001-06:00

There's an easy way to know if you're good at your job. No, it's not 360 feedback. And it's not input from your manager. The number of awards on your office wall? Nope.

Give up?

It's the number of times someone calls you for help. If you're a marketer, it is the number of times:

Field Sales calls you to travel with them to their customers.
Senior management calls you to work on a corporate task force.
R&D calls to get your opinion on new product design goals.
A junior member of the team or a colleague calls to "ask how".

I could go on...Business Development asking your opinion on a potential M&A deal, HR asking you to interview candidates for another department's open position, or Operations to help them understand anomalies in ordering patterns.

And on...Finance asking you to help develop the annual planning calendar, IT to scope out requirements for the new customer portal and Sales Operations to design the new metrics dashboard.

OK, so I've gone overboard to make my point. But a point, nonetheless.

The next time your performance appraisal comes around and your manager begins by asking, "So, how do you think the year went, big guy?", count the number of times your phone rang and let it do the talking.

Copyright @ Keith Chaitoff 2009

2009-01-01T13:07:00.001-06:00

Did the Germans Invent the Pretzelztickzamplezerver?

I only go to the grocery store when my wife is heading there and I’m bored. Or hungry. Or when I need that last minute anniversary cake that I forgot to order – in which case I default to the off-the-shelf one with frosting flowers that nobody likes and generically scribbled, “Happy Anniversary”. It’s a sure give-away that I did not order the cake on time, but something’s better than nothing, right? Right?

It’s always intriguing to see the marketing mélange at the grocery store. On a recent trip I saw a creative point-of-purchase display that looked like a rustic hutch made out of old, grayed barn wood…packed with honey products. I bought some.

But what really caught my eye was a new use for the pretzel stick. I write not of the basic bag ‘o sticks. Nor the fat ones my German friend Dieter serves with beer whenever we’re at his house. Nor the guacamole flavored ones, the flat ones for dipping, the salt-free variety or the ones bent into SpongeBob SquarePants shapes. Rather, I write of the pretzel stick used in place of the toothpick.

As you probably know, the food manufacturers like to stuff you with samples when you shop on weekends. Sam’s offers a veritable smorgasbord. But at our local grocer, someone was thinking. Instead of using the ubiquitous toothpick to serve samples, they came up with the smart idea of using a pretzel stick! No trash for employees to bother with, no three-week old crusty toothpicks hidden behind the eggs as shoppers found a place to discard them; a “green” solution to hacking more trees and simply a nice touch.

The lesson to marketers: creativity counts. And I don’t mean hiring yet another star athlete to hawk your product. I mean truly innovative, fresh ideas that help consumers want to buy your product. And they don’t have to cost a lot. There’s a lot of creativity in your own backyard. After all, unless my friend Dieter tells me otherwise, I doubt the Germans invented the pretzelztickzamplezerver.

Copyright @ Keith Chaitoff 2009

E=MC3...A Winning Equation in the Marketing Trenches

2008-11-27T14:24:00.001-06:00

Since I work later hours than my wife, I typically get to the mailbox first only once every month or two. I'm not sure why, but I've always liked getting the mail. And Wednesday was going to be one of those days. Coming home a bit early to start the long Thanksgiving weekend, I had the chance to get to the mailbox first. Joy! But joy, dampened.

Not dampened because of investment statements - I'm taking the long view on the economy. Not because I received 18 toy catalogues and they remind me that my kids are nearing college age - I love how they are growing up. And not because the Victoria's Secret catalogue had been stolen by my new neighbor. Rather, it's because I - and presumably thousands of others - received those dreaded "checks" issued by credit card companies for immediate use.

I'm proud to be a marketer. I think it's a noble challenge to beat the competition, satisfy my customers and achieve business results. It's real war - measured objectively not by dead bodies, but by revenue, profit and net promoter scores.

So why the dampening of my joy at seeing those "checks"? Because I did not see any warning about high interest rates. It was likely there someplace - maybe in 6 point font buried on the back page. As a marketer, the war should not be won by fooling money out of your customers' pockets. If that's the only way you can win, you should consider it a battle - and eventually you'll lose the war.

So what up with E=MC3? Ethics = moral compass x 3 --> yourself, your customers and your company. Let it point you in the right direction. Win because you're positioning your product in a manner that's superior to your competition, and meaningful to your customers. And profitable to your company. In the end you'll win the war.

Have a great Thanksgiving!

Copyright @ 2008 Keith Chaitoff

Can I Whine About Being Ripped Off? Alternate, Non-Whining Subtitle, "Pigs Get Fat, Hogs Get Slaughtered"

2008-11-08T10:40:00.001-06:00

Unfortunately, ideas for this blog often arise from inept marketing I stumble upon as an everyday consumer. My wife tells me that nobody wants to read about whining, so I promise I'll check it at the door. But, a little learning from real-life scenarios is OK, isn't it?

Let me set the scene for you. We were shopping for curtain rods. As you may know, there is an amazing array of options...wood poles with scrolls, wood poles with glazes, wood poles with glass finials, and on and on (oh, and then there's the same for wrought iron and more). If you choose a wood pole, you then need to choose a way to hang it. Typically, this is with a set of wood supports you buy separately that screw into the wall and then the pole rests on them. And that's where the whining, er, marketing lesson, begins. The pole we chose was a bit ornate, but nothing over top. Cost: $40.00. Not too bad...a few carved scrolly things and some metallic paint dabs to dress it up.

But then we get to the wood hangers...$37.50. My hobby is woodworking, so I KNOW how these things are made - with a cheap piece of pine, cut on a bandsaw, sanded and painted - probably overseas with cheap labor. $3.00 in materials - tops. Let's double that to cover the rest of the P&L expenses and voila, you're at $6.00! OK, let's make it 400% - you're at $12.00. Yep, this is where I began to whine - not about the $37.50, but about the bad pricing decision made by the marketers. We were there to have a positive buying experience. And were - time with my wife on a relaxing weekend after a hectic week, making an improvement to the house, appreciating the industrial design that went into the products, packaging and displays, and then...the rip off (is this a full blown whine, or can I consider it a whimper? I'll ask my wife if it matters).

So, the lesson to marketers? Pigs get fat, hogs get slaughtered. Look at your pricing strategy holistically. Consider the value you're adding (these guilty pole hangers were purely functional, adding no technology or aesthetic value), the competition, your margin and the macro environments you're up against but may not be able to control. And consider the strategy...why not add $15.00 to the pole and include the hangers. Even more margin. An even fatter pig!

OK, now my wife needs to check my draft before I hit "post" for the whine factor...I tried to end on an upbeat lesson. If you see this posted, I passed. If you don't see it, I'm probably whimpering as I hang $37.50 pole supports!

Copyright @ Keith Chaitoff 2008

Don't Get Your Undies in a Clutter

2008-10-19T19:26:00.002-05:00

Much to the dismay of my teenage kids, I'm writing about my shopping trip to buy underwear.

My wife and I were shopping today at a major department store (hint: the chain we were shopping at bought Marshall Field's, and it rhymes with lacy...but more about that later).

As marketers, you know what "clutter" is: the over-abundance of advertising that causes marketers heartburn because they can't get their messages heard by overwhelmed consumers. Today I was overwhelmed by clutter and underwhelmed by undies marketers' abilities to cut through it.

I almost left the store without making a purchase, but then realized I had fodder right before my eyes for this latest posting. Let me tell you what I found:

Tighty-whities. My wife and I debate if you still call briefs "tighty-whities" if they are gray or navy blue. She thinks it's a style, I argue it's the color. Because I've moved to gray, of course, I argue I no longer wear my father's tighty-whities.

Thongs. No comments needed.

Sport briefs: Tighty-whities with longer legs and spandex. Not your father's tighty-whities.

Boxers: Every imaginable color and design. My question: Do business people wear the ones with jalepeno peppers or snow men under suits?

Probably a style or two I've forgotten since I got home. Oh, and did I mention that about six different brands each offered their own slight variation on each?

I finally found the kind of underwear I was looking for on a mannequin (would my wife call it a womanequin if it was displaying her underwear?). After searching, we found the style, brand and size I was looking for on the bottom of a nearby rack, literally inches from the floor. And I don't bend as well as I used to.

So, here's my message to marketers: observe consumers locating your products on store shelves. You know what your packaging looks like, you know how you've organized your point of purchase displays, and you know your competition. The consumer - who, based on my experience, only buys underwear a couple of times per year - does not know the category as well as you do. If you find they can locate your product quickly, without frustration, then you're doing something right. If not, do something about it - now.

Oh, and did I mention that Macy's does not carry anything lacy for men? Not that I care, 'cause I buy gray briefs. I'll leave the tighty-whities for my dad. And the sports briefs for my son.

Copyright @ Keith Chaitoff 2008

Type O Behavior

2008-10-19T09:19:00.001-05:00

It could be your kid's new toy. It could be the new $2,000 flat-panel TV. Or, it could be that new recipe from Cooking Light. Regardless of the source, the scoundrel we're talking about here is the ubiquitous "typo".

(Let's make this fun...sort of a "where's Waldo" game. Find the three typos in this posting, send me a note and I'll promise to consider sending you a prize!)

Intrestingly, I've noticed that most people don't even notice tipos, er, typos. But as a marketer, it's my job. And that of my staff. And that of their stafff. When I find a typo in a piece of product literature, my first thought is, "Hmmm, the Product Manager didn't do their job." And they didn't.

Some of us have a sickness. Call it what you will - typoitis, typoemia, type O behavior - it's that we catch typos at the expense of seeing the real content. Or at least we need to get past the typos first. And yes, that usually means pointing them out in a large group setting.

I've researched the root cause of this disease and have not found the answer, but I have found some possible contributors:

We were first born perfectionists (I'm not)

We're marketers who see the world through a different lens

Our right brain / left brain wiring is screwy

Regardless of the cause, on a page full of text or a PowerPoint full of data (a presentation "no no" in and of itself), some of us zoom in on the typo. So, to all of you aspiring great communicators - marketers or otherwise - check your work. Pleese. We don't need a bunch of Type A's with Type O to top it off!

Copyright @ Keith Chaitoff 2008